The Beginning.

 I said I'd never have one of these. I said I wouldn't blog for the whole world to see. But, I have finally given in. I have made a blog. Why? Simply for the fact that I  love to write. Just by having the freedom to express myself however I'd wish satisfies me. So, This is the beginning of something new, this starts my blog(s).


Change is difficult, and I don't know whether I like it or not. Yes, I love surprises and doing something a little different.. but where do I define the line? How do I know the change I'm making is right for me? Recently I've noticed that the way my life is going today will not be the same next year, and it kind of frightens me. This is the beginning of the end. I'm finally a senior. This time next year,I'll HOPEFULLY be off at college, somewhere far away from home. Is it wrong to be so excited to move on, yet so scared of what is to come? 
 It seems like just yesterday I was seven years old walking thru the ditch, toting a box full of Barbies to go play at Kaeden's every afternoon. Now I'm a senior in high school? How is this even possible? I remember longing to be a senior, thinking about how cool it would be. But now that it's here, it's very bittersweet. I FINALLY have the opportunity to do those "senior" things.. Make a crown, stand in the front of the student section, wear the Senior Girl jersey.. all that good stuff. Although everyone of those activities are exciting and super great, I just sometimes want to go back to kindergarten; I want to run and play with my "bff's", take long naps, and cuddle up with my granddad. Somedays I just don't want to grow up. I don't want to leave all my friends and family. But all the other days, I am ecstatic. I can't wait to go and live out my dreams, to make new relationships with new people.. How can I be so flip-floppy?


I may not understand why.. or even how quite yet, but my life will play on. I can't live my life in fear and I can't be afraid of change. I have to face reality; the beginning of something new and something better is coming my way..


Isaiah 41:10
So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.